As Seen Through the Eyes of His Grandma

“Mom, sit down.” Carol’s distressed call came from Indianapolis saying, “Jeff was killed about an hour ago.” How does one cope and react to such an extreme, heart-rending pronouncement?

December 19, 1981

“Mom, sit down.” Carol’s distressed call came from Indianapolis saying, “Jeff was killed about an hour ago.”

How does one cope and react to such an extreme, heart-rending pronouncement?

First response: extreme anguish—denial—No, Lord, it can’t be…

Then the shock to the body, causing legs to collapse—calling upon God for strength—disbelief.

Immediate knowledge that Jeff is in heaven relieves some pain.

Surely earth is poorer, and heaven is richer because you are there, Jeff.

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February 1, 1982

Jesus completed his work that he came to do—every detail was done—he pleased his Father. He was ready to pay the ultimate price for my redemption!

Thank you, Jesus, for being willing to save us! For providing the way to bring Jeffrey safely to heaven.

Jeff’s life seemed so short—did he accomplish all that God wanted him to? Was I faithful in helping him, teaching him all that I should have, to help him accomplish his work? He was so concerned about his Daddy’s spiritual condition. Did I do enough to help him—to teach him—to encourage him?

Lord, help me to be more sensitive to the spiritual needs of others—to give more of myself and my time for the things that have eternal value. Please allow me the privilege of seeing Jeff’s friends, whom he loved so much, come to Jesus and have the assurance of eternal life—so that Jeff may see them again—and the privilege of seeing his daddy come back to you in complete surrender.

And, Lord, allow us to see, very soon, his brother openly confess that he is trusting Jesus for his salvation! Thank you, Jesus!

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To All Parents

I’ll lend you for a little time a
Child of mine, Christ said,
For you to love the while he lives,
And mourn for when he’s dead.

It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three,
But till I call him back, will you
Take care of him for me?

He’ll bring his charm to gladden
You, and shall his stay be brief,
You’ll have his lovely memories as
Solace for your grief.

I can not promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.

I looked the wide world over in my search
For a teacher true,
And from the throngs that crowd
Life’s lane, I have selected you.

I know you will give him all your love,
Nor think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call
To take him back again.

I fancied that I heard you say:
Dear Lord, Thy will be done,
For all the joy thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we’ll run.

We’ll shelter him with tenderness.
We’ll love him while we may.
And for the happiness we’ve known,
Forever grateful stay.

But shall the angels call for him,
Much sooner than we planned,
We’ll brave the grief that comes
And try to understand.
                        – Anonymous

Carol Sokolsky is a contributing writer for the918, writing several “My Journey” stories about her two sons: Jeff, now living in heaven, and Kavan, who has overcome addiction and is now worship minister at his church in Pittsburgh. Recently, Carol’s mom was in a horrific accident which almost claimed her life. The faith that her mom shared in these two pieces is the same faith that is taking her through the most challenging, physical and emotional healing of her life.

If you have walked through losing a child or a grandchild and need to speak to someone who understands, please contact us. When life throws us curve balls, we just have to know… but God… yes, and even if not, He is still good.